What's your zombie plan?

Do you have a zombie plan? Do you need one? Look no further than this post for some fresh ideas. In honor of our book club's one year anniversary, we chose to read Pride & Prejudice & Zombies (PPZ for short for the rest of this post; thanks Linz). The plot is still based on Jane Austen's original, with the twist of a strange plague that grips England and spawns the unmentionables (aka zombies). The Bennett sisters have now been trained in the deadly arts. Our first book was Pride & Prejudice, so why not?

Here are my favorite passages from PPZ, including one of the several illustrations. Be sure to take notes for your zombie plan :)

"Elizabeth accepted their company, and they set off together, armed only with their ankle daggers. Muskets and Katana swords were a more effective means of protecting one's self, but they were considered unladylike; and, having no saddle in which to conceal them, the three sisters yielded to modesty." p 27

In regards to a marriage proposal from Mr. Collins, Lizzy sets out to be clear in her refusal: "You forget, sir, that I am a student of Shaolin! Master of the seven-starred fist! I am perfectly serious in my refusal. You could not make me happy and I am convinced that I am the last woman in the world how could make you so. Nay, were your friend Lady Catherine to know me, I am persuaded she would find me in every respect ill qualified for the situation, for I am a warrior, sir, and shall be until my last breath is offered to God." p86.

Later in the book, Lizzy is preparing to leave Rosings, and Lady Catherine insists on an escort: "You must send one of my ninjas with them. You know I always speak my mind, and I cannot bear the idea of two young women travelling by themselves. Young women should always be properly guarded and attended, unless they are that rare sort of lady, like myself, who has been trained by the most respected masters in Japan - not by those appalling Chinese peasants." p168

Lizzy and Mr. Darcy still overcome their pride and prejudice and find love. The following passage and illustration describe the scene. "As they made for the house, Elizabeth and Darcy happened upon a herd of unmentionables which had quartered itself in a garden not ten yards from the road. The creatures were biting into ripe heads of cauliflower, which they had mistaken for stray brains. Elizabeth and Darcy laughed at the sight, and for a moment, resolved to keep walking - as the zombies had failed to take notice of them. But, sharing a glance and a smile, the pair realized they had stumbled onto their first opportunity to fight side by side. And so they did." p 302



Perhaps my favorite line is when Lizzy explains to Jane when she first fell in love with Darcy. The new Lizzy seems a little more human to me. "It has been coming on so gradually, that I hardly know when it began. But I believe I must date it from my first seeing the way his trousers clung to those most English parts." p 305


If Pride and Prejudice and Zombies didn't give you enough ideas for your zombie plan, rest assured, here are some more resources:

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has an extensive list.

In addition to a list for zombie planning, they give ideas for more common disaster preparedness plans. Sorry, the safety and health professional in me couldn't resist giving some common sense tips.

One other resource for zombie planning comes from the Rooster Teeth clan. This group takes live game play from the Halo video game and makes cartoons. In one episode, the Red and Blue teams are at another round of capture the flag and zombie planning is part of the theme. It's only 3 minutes long, but worth the time for more priceless zombie planning tips.

Pride & Prejudice...& Zombies

Pride & Prejudice & Zombies by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith is a parody of the classic love story that goes to lengths to make it both humorous and palatable for new audiences, unaccustomed to the sometimes wordiness of older writing styles by infusing the text with references of flesh-eating zombies, crane kicks, and ladies who would just as soon eat the still-beating heart of their social enemies than be dishonored by their impudence. Suffice it to say, it is an accurate depiction of what life in early nineteenth-century England might have been like during an apocalypse of the undead, had you been privy to the society of a group of His Majesty’s best-trained zombie hunters, who also happened to be totally consumed with things like social graces, bonnets, and the merits of chasing sexy militia tail.

Haha, I’m so funny. To be honest though, I had a hard time taking this book seriously, which was probably the point. Literature should be fun and it should reflect the tastes of the day and I have absolutely no qualms in taking liberties with classics in an effort to spread their appeal, this book just didn’t appeal to me in particular. I’m not interested in zombies, vampires, werewolves, etc… I just don’t care. Give me wizards, hobbits, and elves any day, but keep your undead, your cursed, and your gratuitous violence.

One of the redeeming qualities of PPZ (Lindsay’s acronym) is that my husband enjoyed it. We had a couple road trips this month when I regaled him with stories of Elizabeth cleaning house with Lady Catherine’s ninjas and I caught a chuckle here and there. I asked for a zombie tutorial from him and was surprised to learn how little there was to zombie-lore: they have a virus, they don’t feel pain, they eat brains. That’s pretty much it. Not a particularly deep mythology I guess.

I did some of my own fact-finding (thank you Wikipedia) and learned that the myth comes variously form Haitian Vodou, New Orleans Voodoo, West African Vodun, and Hollywood. Of course. Hollywood would blend ancient religious practices and modern warfare and come up with “Resident Evil,” well done western culture. Really, brav-o.